Cultivating Convictions

My convictions were cultivated in me by the grace of God. When I began to think back to write this post, I realized that so many circumstances that seemed very random actually worked together to shape me into who I am today! My parents certainly played a large part in this. Their example has always been wonderful and I know it's been because of their prayers and discernment that they have been able to raise me in the way of the Lord. I was always taught to be like the Bereans by searching everything out through the Scriptures.

Ever since I was a little, little girl I wanted to have a lot of children and be a mother when I grew up. While all my public school friends were deciding they wanted to be doctors, or teachers I found myself frustrated. I didn't want to be any of those, I wanted to be a mother with lots of children. This was long before my family's convictions changed or we even had more than three children. I remember my friends teasing me because I once said that I wanted to beat the world record for most children born to one mother (at the time the world record was 69, by the way. That included 4 sets of quadruplets and 16 sets of twins I believe. =D). Babysitting was (and still is!) my favorite past-time. Whenever a baby was around, I stuck like glue. One of my friends gave me a charm bracelet with a baby carriage on it, because I was the one who wanted to break the world record. Something funny happened to many of those friends. Though none of them wanted to be the world-record holder, they all talked about how they wanted to get married and have lots of babies when they grew up. Now, they not only want little to no children, but many of them don't even want to get married and have turned more toward a feminist mindset. I believe I didn't go in that direction due in part to my family's decision to homeschool.

I was in public school during kindergarten, first, and second grade. Even at my young age, I remember some things very distinctly about public school. There were always the "popular" girls and two girls who feuded every year. I don't remember doing schoolwork in public school. I'm sure we did it but I don't remember it at all! When we started homeschooling I was eight years old. I didn't know the reasons why my parents decided to start homeschooling, but I knew that I never had to get up and go to that awful school again and that thought delighted me! We moved to this house and I was so excited as the basement was transformed into our schoolroom. My mother had previously been a teacher so she created our very own school at home complete with colorful posters, bulletin boards, and desks. I didn't know the spiritual benefits or the Scriptural commands about educating your children at home until much later.

Good literature has also been a key element in shaping my convictions. Some of the most important ones were So Much More, Raising Maidens of Virtue, Beautiful Girlhood, Mother, etc. (You can see and purchase any of these in our Astore in the sidebar.) So Much More really opened my eyes to the whole issue of attending college. Scripture is quoted throughout the book and I found myself with a lot of "Aha!" moments. Why didn't I see it before? The Lord was opening my eyes! My conviction about women and college started with me before my parents even considered it. When I was about 14, I decided I never wanted to go to college. In fact, I was scared to death at the thought of being out on my own and having to fend for myself (part of this was because of a phase of unbelievable shyness that I was going through at the time). My parents just laughed and said I'd grow out of it. When I read the college chapter in So Much More, I was mostly relieved at the fact that I had found an excuse to stay home! I joyously went and showed my mother. But now at nearly 18, this is a heartfelt conviction rather than an excuse. My parents read the book and their convictions changed dramatically.

My heart has always been at home, and I believe that every little girl has this desire from birth. It is only when the combination of bad parenting and her flesh take over that the world is filled with radical feminists and the likes of Britney Spears. I am completely content at home with my family in this season of my life. It's such a blessing and when I think back over what the Lord has done for our family, how He's changed our convictions and given us discernment, I am in awe. My calling as a godly daughter pursuing biblical femininity is the most rewarding place my life could be right now.

I'm so blessed to be able to enjoy the freedom of life in Christ rather than the shackles of the world!

"And if Christ be in you, the body is dead because of sin; but the Spirit is life because of righteousness." Romans 8:10