Tuesday Talks: A Maiden In Waiting

Today is Tuesday Talks here at Stay-At-Home Daughters.



I am reviewing "A Maiden In Waiting", compiled by Crystal Paine.



This booklet is really good. Basically, it is filled with articles and testimonies from young women just like us, sharing what they are learning in their single years about contentment.

Some of the articles include:
"Trust and Obey" by Genevieve Smith (now Genenvieve Smith De Deugd)
"Her Price is Far Above Rubies" by Annie Kolb
"Service: The Key to Contentment" by Sarah Race
"Wait on the Lord" by Victoria Lind
and several more!

I really enjoyed reading this. I know you will too!

We would love to read your reviews! Leave your link below and don't forget to comment! :)

God bless,
~*~Courtney~*~

Reader Question

Bethany T. writes:

Hi, I had a question for you guys. If you could give me some insight, I would really appreciate it. I am the only SAHD in my church. How might I balance keeping my beliefs and opinions to myself to not offend, and being honest and giving folks a different perspective outside of the college/career path? I don't know what sort of sympathies you have in your church, but any insight you might have would be helpful. Thanks, Bethany T.

My soul waits in silence for God only; From Him is my salvation. He only is my rock and my salvation, My stronghold; I shall not be greatlyshaken. Psalm 62:2

I'm going to share a little bit of encouragement for Bethany, then I'd like our readers to chime in with whatever they feel appropriate!

First of all, Bethany, I know just how you feel. There are quite a few stay-at-home daughters in my church, but I know many others who are not at all understanding about my current position. When you are living your life to the glory of God, you are going to have people look at you funny now and then. If not, then you are doing something wrong. I take comfort in that daily!

Don't worry about offending others. Live your life the way the Lord leads you! As long as you are displaying a gentle and quiet spirit, the Lord will take care of the hearts those around you in his perfect will. When asked about your situation, or your convictions, explain in the politest way possible, answering every question with as much insight as you think will best benefit the inquirer. Don't get into a confrontation - if someone is getting pushy or trying to sway you, let your father (or mother) handle it. Most of the time, this will not happen. I usually have people get very quiet or try to change the subject.

Simply modeling a biblical worldview and a gentle and quiet spirit will show others that you are different from the average college aged girl. Most people who ask will have a genuine interest in your beliefs and why you do what you do - even if they are not likeminded.

Trust the Lord, Bethany, model your beliefs in your behavior and answer other's questions politely. Don't be afraid to offend others. Let them be offended if they wish - you're not telling them what they have to do with their life, you're simply living as the Lord leads you.

I hope this answers your question! If you have any extra, or more specific questions feel free to comment! Readers, please chime in with your thoughts on this matter, I'm sure you can be much more eloquent and helpful than I can!

Tuesday Talks: Raising Maidens of Virtue

I hope you are having a great Tuesday! Today I'm reviewing "Raising Maidens of Virtue" by Stacy McDonald.

Here is the description from the book's website:

More than a fill-in-the-blank Bible study, Raising Maidens of Virtue is an engaging tool for mothers to use in training daughters who are approaching womanhood to think biblically. Through stories, conversational teachings, illustrations, and memory-making projects, Raising Maidens of Virtue covers topics such as guarding the tongue, idleness, sibling relationships, honoring parents, contentment, modesty, purity, cleanliness, and feminine biblical beauty.

This is an excellent resource and very encouraging! It's excellent for mothers and daughters to work through, or older daughters and younger sisters, or just for a daughter or mother to read on their own. I've used it when giving a devotion to a group of young girls - each chapter can stand on it's own, but the whole book is designed to work together to encourage feminine loveliness. I recommend it highly, it's one of my favorite books!

You can purchase it from Vision Forum, or our Astore in the sidebar.

Do you have a review to share? Post your link below!

The Hand that Rocks the cradle...

If you're like me, you'll be inspired by this post.

A Few Brief Thoughts on Hospitality

Many people I have come into contact with believe that the best place for a women to use her talents is out on the mission field. What they don't realize is how effective a girl can be in sharing the gospel from her home! This is why hospitality is so important for a stay at home daughter, as well as a stay at home wife and mother.

Being hospitable is not just the outward actions of entertaining guests and strangers, but it's also a matter of the heart. The home reflects the actions and attitudes of it's inhabitants. If you are cross and unfriendly, no one will find your home warm or inviting! If your house is God-centered, your home will be warm and comfortable to outsiders. This is one of the best ways a young girl can minister to the lost! It's also an indispensable tool for discipleship. Your home is not a place to hide away and block out the world. If you act like someone is imposing on your time or space, you will have lost your opportunity!

"Use hospitality one to another without grudging." 1 Peter 4:9

I've had many wonderful chats with friends and neighbors about our lifestyle and such at various parties and gatherings. If you are shy, or nervous about answering difficult questions the best way to become more at ease is to practice! Don't worry about what others think of you. Simply speak from your heart and rely on the Lord.

When done with the whole heart, homemaking is an art form! Cooking, cleaning, and decorating either for guests, or just your family can be a pleasure if you choose to see it as such! Sometimes, hospitality is simply helping with these things rather than actually interacting with the guests.

Hospitality is not always done from the home. The ministry of your home can also be doing things like cooking for invalids or new mothers or helping at your church. It's not necessary to be confined to your house, just as long as your family is centered from your home, which is centered on God.

"Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares." Hebrews 13:2

Do you have anything to add? Leave your thoughts in a comment below!

Image from Allposters.com

Happy Birthday Flibby!

Today is Flibby's birthday!

I have known Flibby for several years now, and look up to her as a great example of Godly daughterhood. She is always serving others and ministering to people- I can't wait to see how God uses her this coming year!

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

A Time for Everything

"There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace. "

Happy Birthday Flibby!
~*~Courtney~*~

Being Productive during your Single Years

Today I thought I'd share some ways that a single girl can live a fulfilled and productive life at home!

Sometimes it's easy to be unproductive or fall into slothfulness. I struggle with this from time to time. My natural self is lazy at heart and it takes a lot to conquer this fault! Some things I do to get motivated, particularly in the morning during chores and school are:

• Do your quiet time - When you start your morning with quiet time, the whole day goes better. It's much easier to be pleasant and productive when you have had your morning Bible reading and prayer time. Asking the Lord for help being productive is so very important.
• Get dressed - This may seem very obvious, but when you are homeschooled and don't leave the house as much, it's convenient to stay in your pajamas all day! It makes me feel much better and much more productive if I'm dressed and matched, with shoes, jewelry and makeup. It's truly amazing what this does to one's disposition.
• Put on some music - Music helps everyone feel peppy and happy! Singing is so much fun when working and Snow White was right, whistling while you work helps too!
• Wear an apron - Whenever I wear an apron I feel so much more feminine and productive. It's amazing what a little piece of cloth can do. It doesn't have to be anything fancy. Plus, it's harder to get your clothes dirty! ;)
• Just get to work - When all else fails and you just aren't feeling very productive, just start working. Chances are, once you are in the middle of the chore it will be easier to get motivated to finish!
• Find a quiet place - When doing schoolwork, it's essential to find a quiet place to work. It's near impossible to be productive when so many distracting things are going on around you. I usually go outside, in my room, and I've even been known to do my schoolwork in my closet! Anywhere that you can concentrate.

Just remember:

"And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ." Colossians 3:23-24

Another thing I'd like to discuss, along the same lines, are some things other than schoolwork a girl can work on, particularly after high school graduation. These are things like:

• Homemaking Skills - It's very important for a girl to use this time in her life to learn the things that she, Lord willing, will need in the future as a wife, mother, and homekeeper. These include cooking, cleaning, all kinds of needlework and sewing skills, gardening, canning, making gifts, shopping, managing money and other various life skills.
• Helping your younger siblings with their schoolwork - This can be a great help to your mother, as well as a blessing to your siblings. It's also wonderful practice for you if you one day have the privilege of becoming a homeschooling mother!
• Reading and Writing - After graduation, this is the best way to further your education on your own. All you really need to be thoroughly educated are good books and a willing mind. Writing is a wonderful way to express yourself and what you've learned. You can write on a blog, which is the easiest way to publish your thoughts, or you can be adventurous and submit an article to a magazine or a popular website. This allows you to share your talent and passion with many others.
• Investing your time in your family and your church - This is perhaps the most important area of a girl's life. What a wonderful way to spend your single years! Instead of focusing on yourself, share your energies and talents with those around you. Doing for others is extremely rewarding and lots of fun!
• Journaling - I quite enjoy journaling. There's no pressure for me to write exceptionally well or collect my thoughts. I simply write what's on my mind or what's happened during the day. It's very nice to have that recorded for later use. I can come back years from now and see exactly what day this happened, or what I was thinking about when I was thirteen. I've kept a multitude of journals over the years and it's really a fun activity!
• Running a Home Business - This is a great way to start saving for your future. I run a very small graphic design business from my home computer and I'm also going to start teaching piano lessons to beginners. Just take some time to think about your strengths and use this time at home to expand those skills or learn some new skills that could one day be marketable. You can be such a blessing to others by running a home business. These are skills that can help you be a helpmeet to your future husband as well.
• Have fun! - This is a wonderful season of your life! Play with your family, get together with friends, socialize at church and use these years without the responsibility of a family of your own to the fullest. Never take any of it for granted. The Lord has been so good to me! I have no reason at all to be anything but thrilled.

May the Lord bless you during your years as a stay at home daughter!

--Flibby

Tuesday Talks!

Tuesday Talks is here once more!



I am reviewing "Coming In on A Wing and A Prayer".

When I first saw this book, I thought it was a boy book about airplanes and war- things which are somewhat boring to me.

Little did I know that I was quite wrong. This is a wonderful book, written from the perspective of a Grandmother writing to her grandchildren about her Grandfather's legacy, therefore passing the legacy down through many generations. She writes of his time in Iwo Jima and about the hardships and duties there.

There are several photgraphs and little notes sprinkled throughout as well. You do not want to miss this book!

The Amazon review reads as followed:

"He was only five years old when a local barnstormer offered to take young Bill Brown for a flight in a biplane in exchange for one of his mother’s home-cooked meals. That day birthed a life-long fascination with aviation. As a young man, he grew up near the home of the man who would become the most famous pilot of the Second World War — Jimmy Doolittle of the “Doolittle Raiders.” By twenty-one, Brown had earned his own wings and found himself as a flying P-51 Mustang fighter pilot performing daring raids from battlefields like Iwo Jima. Ultimately he was shot down during a combat mission over Japan, but would live to become a dynamic servant of the Cross. Featured in the film, The League of Grateful Sons, Bill Brown is now the subject of a thrilling story of combat, faith, and fatherhood told through the eyes of granddaughter Kelly Brown. In Coming In on a Wing and a Prayer, a beautiful, pictorially rich book, Kelly recounts the life of her flyboy grandfather as a letter to generations yet to be born. One of the most encouraging books you will read this year. Hardback. 55 pgs."

This very sweet and wonderful story is written by Kelly Brown (now Bradrick), and is available through our Astore or Vision Forum.

Would you like to post a review? Leave your link below!





Have a great Tuesday!
~*~Courtney~*~

Finding Joy in the Home

One of the pitfalls facing young ladies today is the yearning for something outside of the home. So many young ladies say, "Oh, if only I could get out of this house and travel the world!","I need to use my skills in the workplace!","I could accomplish great things!" It's easy to lose focus and become distracted with the glamorous temptations of the world. Satan can make so many things look appealing and harmless. Proverbs 23:17-18 says, "Let not thine heart envy sinners: but be thou in the fear of the LORD all the day long. For surely there is an end; and thine expectation shall not be cut off." Remember that God's calling for women is to be in the home, whether as a daughter or a wife and mother.

A lot of girls have trouble being content in their role as daughter. "I'll be happy once I have a husband." If you aren't happy in this season of your life, you won't be happy in the next season either... contentment must be cultivated early. God wants us to make the most of our time now, not when we finally get married. Spend your time making the most of being an unmarried daughter by serving your family and your church with joy and not pining away the days yearning for marriage and children.

Though marriage is most commonly a lady's calling, sometimes God calls girls to singleness. While this may strike terror in the heart of many young ladies, it's important to keep your heart soft and turned to the Lord for His guidance. If He were to call you to singleness, would you be content? If you are content as an unmarried woman now, it will be much easier should you be called to remain single.

As much as I hope to be married one day with my own children, I absolutely adore my family and would be happy to stay here forever. A very wise lady once told me, "Bloom where you're planted." And that's exactly what I try to do on a day by day basis by serving my family within my home. I find great satisfaction and joy in cooking a simple dinner, clearing land for a garden, and playing piano with my siblings. Finding joy in my work is the first step to finding joy in the home. My mother has been teaching us to do our work cheerfully ever since we could walk! No matter how we hated to do the chores, if everyone did them with a cheerful heart, soon we were all smiling and conversing with each other during our work - which made it much more fun! Whether or not your work is a pleasure or "household drudgery" is up to you.

I would encourage you not to dwell on the petty inconveniences that come with homelife. Let those things be quickly forgotten and sometimes even laugh at them! Take time to step back and not only analyze the big picture and true vision, but keep the wonderful aspects in the forefront of your mind. In my house, there is absolutely no way anyone can be in a sour mood when my baby brother has a laughing fit! Everyone of my family members has a brilliant personality and is a tremendous joy! Our home is filled with music, laughter, and playful drama. When the weather is nice, I love nothing more than to be outside with my family enjoying God's creation. Sometimes it's the small, simple things that can bring the most joy to my heart. Most importantly, I take joy in my work because I know it's a blessing to my family. It's just another way I can show God's love to them through my own attitude of contentment simply by finding joy in everything I do!

Look to the Lord for your strength and your encouragement. With constant prayer and trust in Him, He will grant you a truly contented heart.

For those of you who are already content in the season of unmarried womanhood, praise the Lord! It is so wonderful to have blessed friendships with like-minded Christian girls. It has been such a blessing to glean wisdom and encouragement from other girls following the same path. My mother has always been the most influential person to me in this manner as well. I especially love to sit at the feet of the older Titus 2 women in my church. They have so much to share about their lives and their spiritual journeys. It's amazing to look back and see how far the Lord has brought them, and it reminds me how far I still have to go!

The Lord is good!

But godliness with contentment is great gain. 1 Timothy 6:6

Guest Blog!

I was published on Crystal's blog yesterday! In the midst of her Valentine's Day contest, she posted several guest blogs that pertained to the topic of unmarried daughters.You can view my article here, and be sure to vote for the winner of her annual Valentine's Day contest for the unmarried!

Graphic taken from Crystal's blog - from Allposters.com

Valentine's Day for Stay-At-Home Daughters

Valentine's Day has always been one of my favorite times of the year! Even though it's emphasized as a holiday for couples, we always make it a wonderfully fun day for everyone in our house! Each year we make our own home-made Valentines and pass them out to everyone in the family... it's become quite a fun tradition! We try to 'out do' last year's Valentines with new fresh ideas!

Here are some of the cards I made for my family this year.

I can't wait to see what the rest of my family has come up with!!

Recently, I've been thinking about ways that a stay at home daughter can reach out to others on Valentine's Day. Last year, a good friend from my church held a Valentine's bake at her home. All of the single girls in our church got together and had a wonderful time socializing while baking cookies for the older members of our church, as well as those who were stuck at home or sick. It was wonderful fun and those cookies were such a blessing to our church members! I also love to voluteer at the local assisted living center and nursing home. The people there love to hear hymns and I love to play them on the piano. It's so much fun to spend time with older people-- they are so wise and have so much to tell!

This year, I've already been preparing and planning ways that I can glorify God on Valentine's Day as an unmarried daughter. First of all, I made Valentines and wrote lengthy letters to some of my more distant relatives telling them all about what our family is up to now and how much they mean to us. I know they'll love to receive those, especially my great-grandmother and great-aunt! I also helped my younger siblings with their letters and valentines for our relatives.

I love to serve my family by cooking and baking, and this year (shhhh, don't tell) I'm making a surprise Valentine's day dinner complete with a fancy cake. I even bought a special tablecloth to decorate our table.

Be sure to check back, I'll post pictures of the finished cake (and supper). Hopefully it will turn out well! I've already bought some frosting.... mmmm....


Another way I've helped others celebrate Valentine's Day is by babysitting for my family or the neighbors so that parents can enjoy a night out together. While their parents are gone, I help the children make special messages for their mom and dad... and leave them on their pillowcase! My parents love to receive cards and surprises from us!

These are just a few ideas for an unmarried young lady to be a blessing to others on Valentine's Day! I'd love to hear your suggestions! Leave a comment below!

Crystal from Biblical Womanhood is holding a great Valentine's Day contest for the unmarried, the deadline is tomorrow! Head on over there and take a look!

--Flibby

Why I Wear A Dress

A lot of people ask me why I wear dresses, and why I prefer them to pants. I decided to post some of the most common questions I receive about the dress/pants issue.

Why would you want to wear a dress/jumper/skirt? Wouldn't you rather have the "freedom" of wearing pants?
I find that I can still do everything I could do in pants in a skirt or dress. I can do home construction, ride a bike, mow the lawn, and do it all in a skirt! There is very little that I "can't" do in a skirt. Right now, I can't even think of one thing.

Pants are more comfortable and less constricting, right?
For me, I found that this was totally different. There was actually more room to move about in most skirts. There are some skirt styles that do have less leg room, but I find that it helps me to take small, lady-like steps.

OK, I like the idea of wearing dresses, but I can't find anything decent!
Most of my skirts/dresses are found online or secondhand. I also have sewn many of my skirts/dresses. One of my favorite skirt patterns can be found for free here, and I would also like to make this pattern here. It really is easier than it looks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few reasons I like to wear a skirt
They are more feminine
They are more comfortable
They can be dressy or casual
They twirl so nicely
My list could go on and on!

How about you? Why do you like/dislike dresses and skirts?

Have a great day!
~@~Courtney~@~

Fruits of the Spirit: Love

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law." Galatians 5:22-23

We are beginning a new series here on Stay-At-Home Daughters! Every month check back for the next installment of our fruits of the spirit series. February's topic is love. How fitting! I'm going to share practical ways a Stay-At-Home Daughter can show love to her family, friends and those who persecute her.

The hardest aspect of love, for me, is being able to show love to those who hate you, persecute you, or wish to show you harm. When presented with a challenge or accusations, I answer them gently and cautiously. As the Proverb says:

"A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger." Proverbs 15:1

Sometimes those you love turn from the ways of the Lord, and can become what the Bible calls, "a heathen". Matthew 18 explains how to deal with this,

Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.

But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.

And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.
Matthew 18:15-18

I have various extended family members from whom we have had to separate ourselves. Many other family members argue that we are "not showing Christian love" when we don't support the lifestyle of the rebellious. On the contrary, biblically this is the only way we can truly show Christian love to our brethren, by following biblical example and demonstrating the fact that their lifestyle is not okay. Though this may seem harsh, ultimately we have to answer to an almighty God for our actions, not our family members. The best way to show Christian love for them is to pray for them. We pray for our lost extended family members and friends, and those who try to convince us that we are in the wrong.

For some girls, loving those closest to you can be tough. I thought I'd share some ways to not just get along with your siblings and family, but to show the love of Christ to them in everyday life.

Simple gestures of kindness mean a lot! My mother loves it when I bring her a glass of tea, start the laundry, iron, clean out the refrigerator or any other simple task without being asked. A lot of times, your family won't even notice the small things you do for them, but that's ok! The Lord will take notice! Remember -- character is who you are when no one is looking. Not seeking recognition for something is a wonderful way to exercise selflessness. The most important way to show love to your parents is to be submissive to them as your God given authority, and show cheerful obedience and respect. Sometimes when I want to do something helpful for my mother, I take my siblings and do something to keep them occupied. This is a great way to not only show love for your parents, but your siblings as well! The way your younger siblings will pick up on how much you love them is by how much time you spend with them! Playing with them may not be the most fun for you, but to them it's such a thrill!

My little sister loves when I make cards for her. Just a little piece of paper folded with a flower drawn on the front is enough to make her smile! It's easy to tell what things your siblings love when you spend time getting to know them. Every once in a while I prepare surprises for my little siblings, like a treasure hunt! They get so excited over such a simple thing! My little siblings also love it when I read to them, or sing to them. I love to be able to tuck them in at night and tell them I love them.

My sister (Poppy) and I are best friends. We talk about everything, joke, laugh, and share the same interests. The Lord was so good to put her in my life, but I know that everyone has different situations. Some of you may have siblings that are older, or very close to you in age. The best way I've found to show love to older siblings is to listen to them, being sensitive to their wishes and needs, and show them respect. It's much harder to get into arguments if you have their best interest at heart. Spend time learning things together! My sister and I have spent the past few months mastering the splits. It's so much fun to stretch together everyday! She and I exercise with my mom regularly, we shop together, we take piano lessons together, and we write this blog together! We have quite a few differences, and we have some disagreements, but we love and respect each other.

Overall, to learn how to truly apply this fruit of the spirit to your life, you have to learn to put yourself last! Selflessness is a trait that isn't easy to master, but the Lord can make it your second nature. Also, pray for your family, your friends, and fellow man, pray for the lost and the weary and pray for the Lord to help you show His love to the world.

God has blessed me with an intense love for those around me. It's such a blessing to be able to find joy in simply spending time with people!

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.

Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13

Dealing with "The College Issue" and Other Difficult Questions

As a follow-up on the last post, I'd like to address how I deal with difficult questions from family members and nosy neighbors. ~wink~

The most popular questions I get are:

The college question: This comes in the form "What college are you going to attend?", and more indirectly, "What are you doing after you graduate?"

For all questions I follow a simple rule of thumb: if the inquirer is genuinely interested in my convictions, I answer gratefully and sincerely all of the questions they ask. The purpose is then to benefit the inquirer. If, on the other hand, the inquirer is asking for the simple reason of trying to question my sanity, be rude, or they simply think it's their responsibility to make sure I "get started in the right direction", I answer briefly, change the subject, or "smile, nod and back away." I find with most people, when I state that I'm staying home after I graduate, they can't change the subject fast enough.. (My mother wrote a wonderful post on answering questions here.)

I usually answer with, "I'm staying home after I graduate and furthering my education on my own." and leave it at that. I have very rarely had to expound, because most people don't care. (my thoughts on this issue can be found here, here, and here.)

Testing: This is when someone tries to test me and my siblings by asking various academic questions. This is usually only performed by those who are against homeschooling or want to make sure my mother is doing what she should. I never answer these questions, it's simply not their place to test us. I have had to intervene when my siblings were being tested before. I never want to be rude, but I usually say lightheartedly that they get enough testing in school. It aggravates me that people try to mess them up by putting them on the spot. Most often, my parents intervene before this goes too far.

So, what do you do?: People ask me this question now, since I'm not bombarded with extracurricular activities, and I'm sure I'll get this question much more after I graduate. I answer truthfully with all of the things I do to help my family around the house. There is quite a lot when you think about it! Courtney wrote a lovely post about this very question recently.

"When are you going to get a job/your driver's license/etc.?": This comes from people who are quick to assume I'm not content at home. Once again, I answer with discernment, depending on what exactly their intentions are and I let them know that I am perfectly content to be at home with my family. (I am going to get my driver's license soon. But, the reason for having a license is not to be "free" from being tied down to my home, as most assume.)

Sometimes I get a snide comment which I have to answer. For example: "I know you just can't wait to get away from all these kids." (talking about my siblings). Most of the time, I ignore snide comments completely.

Whenever I know I'm going to be around those who are not like-minded, I prepare by reminding myself why I believe what I believe. Though, it's not very often that I get questioned thoroughly, always being prepared is a help to me. There was one evening when I stayed up very late into the night studying and reminding myself how to answer tough questions. I knew I was going to be around my extended family for a long period of time, and I was very glad to feel prepared. I never want to be prideful when asked questions like this, nor do I want to feel disheartened.

I don't answer correctly every time. When I was first asked to defend my convictions I made many fumbles and embarrassed myself continually. I was always too passive. I had to practice and learn to stand firm in my beliefs, without being rude, and now I can answer much more clearly and confidently. I still make mistakes from time to time, but I trust the Lord when I'm feeling inadequate.

Some very wonderful answers to some of these questions (namely the college question) can be found here at Visionary Daughters, the blog by the authors of So Much More and the documentary, "Return of the Daughters".

I hope this has been a help to you! God bless you as you live for the Lord as a Stay-At-Home Daughter.


~Flibby

Cultivating Convictions

My convictions were cultivated in me by the grace of God. When I began to think back to write this post, I realized that so many circumstances that seemed very random actually worked together to shape me into who I am today! My parents certainly played a large part in this. Their example has always been wonderful and I know it's been because of their prayers and discernment that they have been able to raise me in the way of the Lord. I was always taught to be like the Bereans by searching everything out through the Scriptures.

Ever since I was a little, little girl I wanted to have a lot of children and be a mother when I grew up. While all my public school friends were deciding they wanted to be doctors, or teachers I found myself frustrated. I didn't want to be any of those, I wanted to be a mother with lots of children. This was long before my family's convictions changed or we even had more than three children. I remember my friends teasing me because I once said that I wanted to beat the world record for most children born to one mother (at the time the world record was 69, by the way. That included 4 sets of quadruplets and 16 sets of twins I believe. =D). Babysitting was (and still is!) my favorite past-time. Whenever a baby was around, I stuck like glue. One of my friends gave me a charm bracelet with a baby carriage on it, because I was the one who wanted to break the world record. Something funny happened to many of those friends. Though none of them wanted to be the world-record holder, they all talked about how they wanted to get married and have lots of babies when they grew up. Now, they not only want little to no children, but many of them don't even want to get married and have turned more toward a feminist mindset. I believe I didn't go in that direction due in part to my family's decision to homeschool.

I was in public school during kindergarten, first, and second grade. Even at my young age, I remember some things very distinctly about public school. There were always the "popular" girls and two girls who feuded every year. I don't remember doing schoolwork in public school. I'm sure we did it but I don't remember it at all! When we started homeschooling I was eight years old. I didn't know the reasons why my parents decided to start homeschooling, but I knew that I never had to get up and go to that awful school again and that thought delighted me! We moved to this house and I was so excited as the basement was transformed into our schoolroom. My mother had previously been a teacher so she created our very own school at home complete with colorful posters, bulletin boards, and desks. I didn't know the spiritual benefits or the Scriptural commands about educating your children at home until much later.

Good literature has also been a key element in shaping my convictions. Some of the most important ones were So Much More, Raising Maidens of Virtue, Beautiful Girlhood, Mother, etc. (You can see and purchase any of these in our Astore in the sidebar.) So Much More really opened my eyes to the whole issue of attending college. Scripture is quoted throughout the book and I found myself with a lot of "Aha!" moments. Why didn't I see it before? The Lord was opening my eyes! My conviction about women and college started with me before my parents even considered it. When I was about 14, I decided I never wanted to go to college. In fact, I was scared to death at the thought of being out on my own and having to fend for myself (part of this was because of a phase of unbelievable shyness that I was going through at the time). My parents just laughed and said I'd grow out of it. When I read the college chapter in So Much More, I was mostly relieved at the fact that I had found an excuse to stay home! I joyously went and showed my mother. But now at nearly 18, this is a heartfelt conviction rather than an excuse. My parents read the book and their convictions changed dramatically.

My heart has always been at home, and I believe that every little girl has this desire from birth. It is only when the combination of bad parenting and her flesh take over that the world is filled with radical feminists and the likes of Britney Spears. I am completely content at home with my family in this season of my life. It's such a blessing and when I think back over what the Lord has done for our family, how He's changed our convictions and given us discernment, I am in awe. My calling as a godly daughter pursuing biblical femininity is the most rewarding place my life could be right now.

I'm so blessed to be able to enjoy the freedom of life in Christ rather than the shackles of the world!

"And if Christ be in you, the body is dead because of sin; but the Spirit is life because of righteousness." Romans 8:10

So, what do you do?

Hello there!

I hope that this Friday finds you well. I know that our day has been lovely.

Several people have asked me about what kinds of things I do while serving here at home. I thought I would answer some of those questions tonight.

First of all, a typical daily schedule for me looks something like this:

5:00 -I get up for the day and I do my Bible/quiet time, and then start my school work, and continue school until 7:00.

7:00 - Make bed/clean room/get dressed, and if Mom hasn't started a load of laundry, I start one.

7:30 - Straighten zone (my zone is the kitchen, and I usually use this time to clean glass, wipe out the refrigerator, dust, etc.)

8:00 - Eat breakfast/kitchen clean up, swap laundry out (I usually just load the washing machine, most of the time my younger siblings take care of loading/unloading the dryer),and I usually do some school reading here (currently it is Tithing and Dominion, and it is a great book!)

9:00 - Read-alouds/school work

10:00 - School hour with little ones (I do the music lessons and phonics lessons)

11:00 - Piano practice

11:30 - Violin practice

12:00 - Eat lunch/kitchen clean up/straighten house quickly, and do some school reading

1:00 - Finish school, start web work (my family owns several web based businesses)

3:00 - Straighten house, and then we usually go outside for a little bit. I usually to some school reading here as well.

After that, we usually cook dinner and do a nice evening routine(including spending lots of time with Dad when he comes home from work)

This is a very loose schedule. In my spare minutes, I finish any leftover chores or school, help with the laundry, help my Mom with anything she needs, hold little Jon, spend time with my siblings, work on house renovations, sew or craft, blog, bake little goodies, enjoy corresponding with several pen pals, do additional music practice, and all sorts of things! We also have scripture cd's, lecture cd's and other misc. school cd's while we are cleaning or not doing sit down school work.

It is very easy to stay busy at home, which is my Biblical place. I enjoy helping my Father in business, helping Mom with the children or the house, etc.

Some of the questions I get are:

Do you ever get tired of being at home? Wouldn't you rather be out with your friends?

First of all, I never tire of being here at home. It is the best place in the world for me! There is always a batch of cookies to make, a neighbor to visit, a new pattern to sew, a bathroom to renovate, or a home business to help with! My house is the most exciting place in the world!


What about a job? Don't you want to have a job so that you can support yourself?

Why would I want to further a stranger's business, when I could be furthering my Father's business instead? I find great pleasure in helping my Dad with our businesses and being entrepreneurial with my family.

Which leads me to the next question,

What do you actually do for your business?

I learned to program HTML and ASP last year, so my brother and I are in charge of a lot of the background operations on our websites. I also help to take the pictures for the websites, and I am currently working on several Ebooks to be launched in the spring.

Well, helping your Dad is nice, but what if my Dad doesn't have a business?

There are lots of ways to help your Dad, even if he is not in business in a way you can help. Ask him about his vision for your family. Ask if there is anything you can help him with outside of doing business. When we were renovating the mstr. bathroom in my home, my Dad and I hung the cement board for the tub surround. It was a nice time simply to talk to him and ask him about things we planned to do for the next year or so.
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If you have any questions for me, you can leave a comment below, and I will get back to you asap!

Wishing you a good night,
~@~Courtney~@~

Help Your Family With Holiday Cleaning

Good Afternoon!

I am doing a quick posting, because my family has been busy preparing for our upcoming Thanksgiving. While working on that, I was inspired to post about some of the ways girls can help their families with cleaning tasks!

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1. When working on a task assigned to you, do it with a cheerful heart and countenance. - Your attitude greatly effects those around you. If you are complaining, whining or grumbling, you can be sure that soon everyone will be in foul moods as well. We are called to spread peace, not strife.

2. Work well with those around you. - Fighting over who does what is not only going to prolong the task, but again, we are to spread peace, not strife. (See Above, #1)

3. Ask if there is something you can help with. - Many times your Mom or Dad could use help, but are simply too busy to ask! You can be a huge blessing just by asking! Again, cheerfulness is very important!

4.Watch younger siblings. - Sometimes the best way to help is to watch your younger siblings. I babysit for my parents, and that allows them to go grocery shopping or do other errands quickly and efficiently, which brings us to #5:

5.Efficiency! - Wandering from room to room is not working efficiently! Picking things up from one place and sitting them somewhere else is not efficient. Being lazy is not efficient. Picking up after yourself, helping younger siblings to pick up after themselves, cleaning systematically, etc., are all good ways of being efficient.

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I hope these are useful to you, I know we are busier than usual in the holiday season, and these are good things to keep in mind!

Have a wonderful day!

~@~Courtney~@~

On being my father's daughter

Many girls do not consider serving their fathers a joyful experience much less embrace that service as truly a blessing. Tragically, many of those who call themselves Christians have no respect for their father (or mother, for that matter). But on this subject, the Bible says:

"Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee." Exodus 20:12

Today I'm going to share some ways that I have found to put this verse into practice.

• Obey him

Obeying your father is perhaps the most important way to honor him. For young women, this should come easily if the will to obey has been cultivated in the years of her childhood. Obeying my father is a joy and a delight! I love it when my father asks me to do something! It gives me a chance to be a blessing to him! In the same way obedience brings joy to my father, disobedience or complaints bring him grief.

• Help him

Helping your father is a wonderful way to be a blessing to him! I love to spend time with my dad as I'm helping him build sets and I love to help him by typing, sewing or giving him my opinions on his work. It's such a fantastic way to practice being a helpmeet to a future husband!

• Talk to him

Something else that can be a blessing to your father is simply spending time talking to him. Besides talking about spiritual matters, you can talk about things that interest him. I know my dad loves it when I show genuine interest in his conversations, hobbies and work. He also loves to hear me talk about what I am thinking and doing.

• Support him

This means to support him in any way possible. Support his vision for your family and find out if there is any way you can help make it happen. My dad comes up with wonderful ideas and I love to support him and encourage him in these endeavors.

• Appreciate him

I never want my father to feel unappreciated! There are plenty of opportunities throughout the year that I can show my appreciation for my father. I love to make him his favorite foods or learn to play his favorite song on the piano. I can even use a blog post to show how much I appreciate him!

I'd love to have more input on this subject! If you have some more ways to encourage young women to be a blessing to their fathers, please leave a comment below!