"That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home,good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2:4-5
Women are called to be most influential to the world by being a helpmeet to their husbands and by raising up and educating the next generation of warriors for Christ, not by influencing those in the workplace. Our belief that women should not work outside the home is quite contradictory to the feminist worldview that is apparent in the world today. Feminists believe that women share the same role as men and can therefore do anything that men can do. This is simply not true. According to the biblical standard, men are to be the head of the household and are the ones who are called to provide for their family, while women are called to be homemakers, mothers, and helpmeets to their husbands. What these feminists do not realize is that, by supporting "women's rights", they are causing women nothing but grief.
"Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life; Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return." Genesis 3:16-19
In these verses we see that the curse of man and the curse of woman are two entirely different things --both with wonderful outcomes. Men have to work hard to provide for their family. Women have to endure hard labor and pain in childbirth. When women are out in the world working, they are embracing both the man's curse and the woman's curse. I, along with the other girls in my family, will not be working outside the home. That is one of the reasons why I am not going to college. There are actually several reasons why my family and I have decided this. The purpose of college is for training an individual for a future career. As I've stated above, I am planning to be a stay at home wife, mother, and homemaker which by the world's standards is not an important occupation and, therefore, is not taught at any college. God's highest calling for women does not require a college degree.
Most people would argue with me at this point saying, "Even if you have no use for a college degree, everyone needs to experience the new level of independence that you get from college!" The independence of the college experience is supposed to prepare young people for "real life". I believe that women should never be completely independent. They are to remain under the roof and authority of their father until the day that they are married when the authority is then transferred to her husband for the rest of her life.
Another reason that I've made the decision to stay home is also one of the same reasons that our family decided to homeschool. It is not only dangerous for a woman to be on her own and unprotected but, along with public schools and private schools, colleges are heavily influenced by Marxism, feminism and a secular worldview... even "Christian" colleges! This is not the place for an impressionable young girl to be spending a great deal of time. Even if the girl thinks her faith is strong enough to withstand this kind of influence, she need not be so deceived. It is especially easy for her Biblical worldview to be destroyed. As stated by Anna Sofia and Elizabeth Botkin in their book, So Much More:
"...long term immersion in an environment of false religious ideas can destroy good character and corrupt morality."
Scripture is clear on this point:
"Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners."1 Cor. 15:33
"Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful." Psalm 1:1
The Bible clearly shows that Christians are not to be associated with all of the wickedness in this world. So many Christians believe that you have to spend time with the wicked in order to evangelize them. This is a false idea, established to give those who call themselves "Christians" an excuse to act like the world. When a young girl is around others who deny Christ and live in rebellion to His Word, she will tend to stray from the biblical truths that her parents have worked so hard to teach her from birth. A father who has worked to shepherd his daughter's heart, can lose that precious possession in a matter of four years in college.
"Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you. And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty." 2 Cor. 6:14-18
Our family strives to be set apart from the world, not giving in to temptations to "fit in" or "go with the flow". We stand firm in our beliefs even when they differ greatly from everyone else. The majority of people - even Christians - believe that a college degree is essential if you are to be successful in life. I believe strongly that it is not. To be successful in life does not include a college degree --far from it. The only true measure of success is complete submission to the Lord God and living according to His providential plan. The last reason that I'm going to mention here (although there are many more) is that young girls will begin to depend on peers more than the loving guidance of her parents during the college years. The closeness that she once had with her family is so easily destroyed! How tragic this can be for the young girl's family!
Originally published Feb. 2007 - on Whiskers on Kittens
6 comments:
Thank you Flibby. You've given me a lot to think about. I understand your beliefs and consider it a noble choice.
I believe that God has called be to be a teacher and a foreign missionary. I would like to study education at a Bible College(I am only considering colleges I know are truly Christian). Through distance PSEO, CLEPs, and APs, I would be able to graduate in less than four years. But education majors have take some classes on campus.
I want to attend college as a way to learn. I think it would help prepare me for teaching. Not to say that I don't value homemaking, on the contrary, I want to be a wonderful mother and housekeeper. I am only a sophomore, so I have some time to decide.
What would you advise in my situation? And with your permission, I would like to link to your blog.
FAITH
Maria
After reading this, I understand your point of view.
Hi, I just found your blog! I think you are a marvelous young girl. I did not have the opportunity to live the blessed life you've lived so far and I'm old enough to be your mom, but I WAnt to understand so if it's ok, as I read your blog, I'd like to ask questions. Here's my 1st!
I understand your desire and choice to stay home, and in truth I agree with it, but, how do you reconcile your worldview to include those girls/women who have'nt the same resources as you. Such as an intact family, or a caring father or a bad economic situation? Thanks!
Hi Maria,
Thank you so much for your comment. I am certainly not an authority on this issue as the Lord is still teaching me and I don't feel qualified to give specific advice to your situation.
What I would do is to encourage you to seek your father's guidance on this issue and to allow the Lord to direct you through your father.
I consider my calling to be a compliment to the calling of my future husband. It may be that the Lord will call you to mission field work through the calling of your future husband. I certainly do not think that preparing for these things is a problem should your father agree that they are important.
My main advice would be to always remain submissive to the Lord through your spiritual head... right now your father, and in the future perhaps, your husband.
Thanks for your comment and you are certainly welcome to link to our blog!
Geri,
A biblical standard is, of course, ideal. I do understand that we live in a fallen world and that these things - whether by circumstances or poor choices - are not always possible and we then have to do the best we can in the situation we are in by trusting the Lord to carry us through those situations.
However, I would say that I think striving for God's best is the call of every Christian man and woman. There are many girls that do not have the blessing of a godly father or any number of other difficulties that make living within biblical standards more difficult.
I would just encourage each girl right where they are to seek to serve the Lord with all her heart, mind, soul and strength. I would encourage unmarried girls to seek the Lord's guidance and direction in sending her a godly husband so that she can create a household that honors the Lord, and that He would bless her with the ability to live out the calling of biblical womanhood.
My own mother and father did not grow up in such a household but they have purposed to create that environment in our home and we are able to reap the blessing of their faithfulness.
So, though someone may not be born into a family where these blessings are already in place, you can purpose to create that type of home in your own family later in life. It's never too late to seek God's best for your family!
Thank you for your questions and keep them coming! Of course, I don't have all the answers, but I'll be happy to offer you advice from the perspective of a teenage girl living out these convictions!
--Flibby
What about girls who don't have Christian fathers?
Kathleen,
A lot of what I mentioned in the above comment to Geri can apply to you as well. Purposing to live for the Lord despite unfortunate circumstances is the best anyone can do. Taking everything to God and examining it in accordance to His word before making decisions is essential. Most people don't have the same resources that I do and I'm well aware of that!
If your father is not a Christian I would first encourage you to pray for him!
Also, in the Botkin sisters' book "So Much More" there is an entire chapter on this called, "Daughters, Fathers and Difficulties." There they answer in detail these questions:
"What if I have a less-than-perfect father?"
"Is there any way I can help my father overcome his weaknesses?"
"How can I help my father with his mission and vision if he doesn't have either?"
"How can I encourage my indifferent father to protect me?"
"How good a relationship can we have with fathers who aren't Christians?"
"When might it become necessary for my to disobey my father in some things, and how can I do this in a biblical way?"
"What should a girl do if her father no longer wants to be her authority figure?"
I would encourage you, or any girl for that matter, to read this book! It's an excellent resource, and very true to God's Word.
I hope this answers your question! If you have any other questions feel free to ask, or email me.
flibbypie@yahoo.com
--Flibby
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